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This post is intended for Christians looking to deepen their faith and mental health and may not apply to my entire reader base.  Photo by Henley Design Studio on Unsplash My daughter Hattie went into hoarding mode this Halloween. Within 5 minutes, she was in MEGA-CUMULATION mode. Emily and I got some good parenting moments; “Hattie, you can choose 2 items from that basket.” (We had to say that about 30 times.) I laugh often when she’s around food, toys, or playground equipment- like an old prospector she stakes her claim. She is offended that others dare lay claim to something she thinks should be hers! How dare they! Now I’ll point the laughter at myself; I am not really that different. I’ve just become more savvy at being socially adept at my control attempts. Hoarding of items to feel secure is a fairly natural response of our human nature, ranging in extremes. A scarcity mindset, i.e., “feast or famine” or to obsessively “protect what’s mine,” though, is selfish and self-focused. It does not “love your neighbor as yourself.” I recommend for myself today- and for you- to look in the mirror every once in a while and ask this tough question: What drives you? Fear-based scarcity? GOD- as your provider? Something else? A story may help illuminate the question. The Hebrew, ‘man hu’ means “It is manna,” and in English, “What is it?” This manna was an incredible food God provided refugee Israelites fleeing from a brutal autocracy that had enslaved them. It's all part of the incredible history of the Jewish people. God accomplished this over many years and utilized several key players, the most famous being Moses. In delivering Israel from Pharaoh and the Egyptians, God led them out through the leadership of a very imperfect man who likely had Social Anxiety Disorder, fulfilling incredible promises, miracles, and almost unbelievable wonders. It's one of the best deliverance stories, maybe in the history of history. If you haven't read it, please do so in the Book of Exodus. So imagine being born into slavery, and you gain total freedom from an overbearing despot. But in order to get away, you must go through the desert. I feel tired and thirsty already. In their refugee state, God promised the Jewish people refuge. But it wasn’t a magical transportation to heaven. Just days after they were freed, they felt the heat of the desert. They had to walk miles and miles. They complained. Only one of the seemingly unbelievable ways God provided for them was through fast, convenient, and sustaining food. It was manna (Exodus 16), which was given in the morning and quail at night. They were already complaing so much they said they wanted to go back to slavery because they had it better in Egypt (*face palm*). In addition to complaining, there was hoarding (Numbers 11) in desperation, lacking reliance on God. I can only guess fear would have been involved. These details, with thousands of years of perspective can make it seem ridiculous to some when we read on paper or pixels. Why wouldn’t you just trust God when he frees you from slavery and performs many miracles before your eyes? I’m afraid my heart isn’t different. I am the same when I lack trust in God by faith.
What if you have an Anxiety or other Disorder that gives you an extra kick in the teeth? Something that makes these things extra difficult? First of all, God is patient (2 Corinthians 12:7-10; 1 Peter 3:9). Secondly, God asks us to seek Him by faith in all things, just like everyone else (Hebrews 11:6; 2 Timothy 2:4). I have an anxiety disorder myself. And God has been incredibly faithful and gentle with me, while also lovingly disciplining me (see Hebrews 12), so that I keep seeking him. If you fall into a scarcity mindset [check out my post “Developing A Growth Mindset”], welcome to the club of being human, but if you also have a disorder that makes it even more difficult to walk by faith over fear, welcome to another club that is very large, indeed; close to half of all people qualify for one mental disorder at some point in their lives. Remember, God is patient. God also still asks us to seek Him by faith, just like everyone else. Sometimes walking by faith means praying, sometimes resting, sometimes therapy, sometimes talking, sometimes serving...you get the gist. As with the Israelites during the Exodus, God accomplished many things over many, many years- and He still is. The Israelites feared, complained, got overwhelmed, and tried to stuff their pockets- directly lacking faith in what God was telling them and showing them. God was patient nonetheless, while he disciplined them. He’s asking us to faith. Faith that God is your provider. Not therapy. Not a nation. Not your employer. Not yourself. Not a president. Not a parent. Not your 401k. Days out from the "great candy grab of 2020," my child's brain experienced the indelible impact of poignant pleasure: she asked daily after this if she could go to neighbor’s front porches!! As I raise her I am prayerful that she will learn well to take her fears and turn to God (and to never be ashamed to get help through CBT or medications). I pray she becomes aware of her God-given feelings and desires, and can ultimately be led back to the rock that is Christ- who is the realization of her greatest hopes and dreams. Also, Candy is nice, too. I’ll take both, please. :)  Photo by Juli Kosolapova on Unsplash
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This video and guide below were specially formulated to help you be mindful in an "Exposure-Friendly" way. This one's a bit different from the average mindfulness practice you might be familiar with. The reason it's called "Exposure-Friendly" is that it is specially designed to help a person be mindful of whatever they are experiencing, not just attempting to feel better. This is a hallmark of exposure therapy: being able to tolerate distress without engaging in pathological responses (rituals, safety behaviors) that negatively reinforce fear. Distractions and relaxation when facing our fears can backfire (see the research at the end of the Guide). So if we need a different set of tools to face fear, here's one of them. I hope it helps. Blessings, ~Justin       Music: As Leaves Fall
Musician: @iksonofficial This post is intended for Christians looking to deepen their faith and mental health.  The Bible has a lot to say about fear and anxiety. In fact, some variation of “do not be afraid” is the most common directive in Scripture, occurring in some fashion more than ‘do not steal,’ ‘do not kill,’ and even ‘love your neighbor.’ How do anxiety and fear work? When we study these constructs in research, we are understanding mechanisms through which the body/brain is informed to face a threat or danger. We can argue these responses are inherently good, with their purpose being survival, protection, and preparedness. Its activation results in the sympathetic nervous system being primed: adrenalin and noradrenalin are produced, cortisol increases, heart rate increases, blood flow moves to muscles and away from extremities, speed and depth of breathing increases, and many other physiological changes occur.[1] I’m grateful to have these responses- when they are in context. Out of context, they suck, to put it bluntly. Problems like panic attacks, worry, phobias, obsessiveness, skin/hair picking/pulling, preoccupation, social fears, avoidance, and more can be quite terrible. One of the things I love most in my walk with Christ is context. Direction. “The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God” (Philippians 4:5b-6, ESV). What is being said here? Partly, “Do not be anxious about anything.” Since anxiety is a feeling of imminent threat- or in other words, it’s at hand- it’s very interesting that immediately before this phrase in Scripture we have another observation revealing a different type of imminence: “The Lord is at hand.” In the context of the Lord being near we are told, “Do not be anxious.” This Greek word for ‘be anxious,’ μεριμνᾶτε (transliterated as “merimnate”), means to be divided and distracted, fearful, and caring for things that are out of context.[2] Sounds a lot like anxiety disorders, right? Yep. Or even just day to day worry/anxiety? Yep. When a person feels anxiety and fear and misinterprets this as significant, a person’s entire life and values can shift to focus on whatever is the subject of their fear, whether classified medically as a disorder or not. This can lead to a preoccupation with avoiding something or someone (spiders, relationships, sex, social situations) to obsessively checking to make sure everything is okay (car, stove, locks, bodily sensations, health, perfectionistic behavior), or pursuing something (money, security, approval of others)- and MUCH more.[3] To help work through these things and avoid pathological responses, I believe we need supports like therapy, help from friends, breathing techniques, mindfulness, exposure techniques, etc. This only underscores our complexity (we are “fearfully and wonderfully made”[4] yet simultaneously all messed up[5]) and highlights what we are told in Scripture about our limits.[6] We can rightly use these tools to help us, just as we do nutrition, medicine, community, and so forth. But there is one thing these tools can’t do on their own: attach us to the very God of the universe and give us a lasting hope and focus- with meaning and purpose at the highest level. So God gives us a jewel of a passage in Philippians 4 where we are kindly reminded what our attention is to be on (context), and a little bit of how we can live it out (practice).[7] It is well known within the anxiety treatment world that even the most effective therapies (here’s looking at you, classic CBT, which I love and specialize in) often need supports to connect to larger beliefs, values, and commitments (ACT, DBT, and MI are some of the most common modalities). If we don’t connect a person to larger motivations and goals than “I just want to feel better,” it is often near impossible for a person to grow with sustainable change for the long term because they don’t have a sufficient reason and value to keep them invested. God gives us this.
Want more? Well, there’s two tips in the next two verses, Philippians 4:8-9
“Anxious for nothing” will take a lifetime to put into practice. I’m grateful to have the opportunity. ~Justin [1] Continued misinterpretation and repetitive experience of these symptoms worsens disorder, like in Panic Disorder, GAD, Phobias, OCD, PTSD, and more.
[2] Bible Hub. (n.d.). 3309. merimnaó. Retrieved July 13, 2019, from https://biblehub.com/greek/3309.htm [3] I think it’s very important to note that we have to be very careful with saying anxiety/fear is sin- and what we mean by this. A lot of Christians get tripped up on this, and many, ironically, become more anxious. The extent of this point would likely require an entire book, so I will not take the space here to elaborate. [4] Psalm 139:14; Genesis 1:26-27 [5] Jeremiah 17:9; Romans 3:23 [6] Psalm 73:26; 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 [7] Oh yes, there’s a whole lot more in Scripture on this topic. Let's not reduce a couple sentences into a "how-to-manual." Want a surefire way to experience more gratitude? Be grateful. I'm not trying to sound trite; those who practice gratitude are more grateful. I struggle to apply this discipline myself. But when I do, I see the world differently. Enjoy the following video (thanks to my brother for passing along). Happy Thanksgiving. |
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Justin K. Hughes, MA, LPC
Owner, Dallas Counseling, PLLC
justin@dallascounseling.com
P: 469-490-2002
17330 Preston Road, Suite 102D
Dallas, TX 75252
Owner, Dallas Counseling, PLLC
justin@dallascounseling.com
P: 469-490-2002
17330 Preston Road, Suite 102D
Dallas, TX 75252
©2019 Dallas Counseling, PLLC
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