Justin’s Blog: “The Jog”

Thomas Plets on Pexels This post was originally published on 05/26/2016 on my wordpress and is newly updated. You’re surrounded by setpoints every day.  They literally keep you alive.  One of them is your set body temperature.  If your body drops or rises a mere 15% beyond your core temperature, death occurs.  Think of a setpoint like […]

This post was originally published on 04/19/2015 on my wordpress and is newly updated. In Latin, Quid Pro Quo means, “something for something.”  You scratch my back; I scratch yours.  Tit for tat.  It’s how the world runs. Or is it? In the business world, this often works.  Social psychology calls it “reciprocity.”  In relationships, well, this […]

If your heart condition were so bad that you had to undergo expensive ($100,000) coronary bypass surgery to improve it, would you change your lifestyle after the surgery?  Nope.  Not likely, at least according to a surprising study by Dr. Edward Miller at Johns Hopkins.  Miller found that 2 years after patients had a coronary bypass surgery, […]

It is sad to see the person looking for a chemical fix to all their problems.  Equally discouraging is seeing marriages torn apart, lost dreams, and lives ended early- when psychiatric medication might have made a difference in the big picture.  Not “pro-meds” or “anti-meds,” as a mental health clinician I am “what is your […]

What are some misperceptions about counseling?  You probably don’t have to think very long before conjuring up an image of an “insane asylum” (ala Cuckoo’s Nest) or a highly pedigreed analyst who only listens and grunts acknowledgment of what you say.  Courtesy of media portrayals, cultural views, and personal fears, there are many myths which abound […]

While purchasing my Kung Pao Chicken with steamed rice yesterday, the young lady at the counter put on gloves to handle money (she normally doesn’t).  Though I always appreciate an extra measure of hygiene, she stated she was nervous about Ebola.  This week, the nation discovered that the first U.S. case of naturally occurring Ebola […]

No relationship is the same.  People are extremely complex- a marriage multiplies that intricacy.  How can a marriage work?  Amazingly, we really know a lot about what makes marriages function on all cylinders.  But there is a gap between knowing and doing, and this is in large part what I work with in counseling. Instead […]

Dad is the tough one; when he comes home, the two kids know there will be a “blow out” if he finds out about their behavior.  He functions as the Persecutor, letting off his steam at Mom and the kids.  But Mom is the Rescuer, jumping in to tell Dad he’s being too hard.  And the kids […]

Birds learn to fly after they step away from the nest; otherwise, they will die.  Most of us intuitively know a similar growing-up progression is required for human beings, but a lot can get in the way of raising a child to become an adult, and conversely, being an adult.A significant portion of my caseload […]

If you’re like over 1 billion people on this planet that use the internet, you have probably searched at some point for information pertaining to your health.  From understanding whether you have a common cold to symptoms of depression, these searches can provide useful information.  I use Google almost daily, and sometimes to understand health-related […]

Who of us has gotten an education on how to romantically pursue another person?  Taken a class?  Learned steps and stages of courtship?  But how many of us would say that having romantic relationships is one of the most important facets of life?  I am often surprised that I didn’t really even learn anything about […]

The holiday season is coming to a close.  2014 is upon us.  If you are like most Americans, you have spent a fair amount of money in the past month.  Whether consciously or not, you have made a substantial number of financial decisions. How much did you drive?  What did you spend on food?  What […]

For many, a popular electronic song of the 90’s came to mind when you saw that title.  I certainly hope so.  It’s an amazing song.  It’s also an amazing question.  What is love, really?  I love my parents; I love fall weather; I love guitar; I love burgers.  But what does it mean?  The ancient […]

As the U.S. heads into the heaviest holiday season of the year, an interesting blend of emotions often come up.  Even for those who find great joy in time with family, it can also be a stressful time.  Join me on a little journey of psychology through some of these dynamics. Expectations.  We all have […]

Possibly the simplest definition of intimacy is this: knowing another and being known.  Intensity is defined as strength, power, or force- in relationship terms, it’s getting a surge of whatever makes a person feel good.  Intimacy is developed over time, with patience, with love, with understanding, with compassion, with sacrifice.  Intensity happens quickly and fades […]