My daughter Hattie went into hoarding mode this Halloween. Within 5 minutes, she was in MEGA-CUMULATION mode. Emily and I got some good parenting moments; “Hattie, you can choose 2 items from that basket.” (We had to say that about 30 times.)
I laugh often when she’s around food, toys, or playground equipment- like an old prospector she stakes her claim. She is offended that others dare lay claim to something she thinks should be hers! How dare they!
Now I’ll point the laughter at myself; I am not really that different. I’ve just become more savvy at being socially adept at my control attempts.
Hoarding of items to feel secure is a fairly natural response of our human nature, ranging in extremes. A scarcity mindset, i.e., “feast or famine” or to obsessively “protect what’s mine,” though, is selfish and self-focused. It does not “love your neighbor as yourself.” I recommend for myself today- and for you- to look in the mirror every once in a while and ask this tough question:
What drives you? Fear-based scarcity? GOD- as your provider? Something else?
A story may help illuminate the question. The Hebrew, ‘man hu’ means “It is manna,” and in English, “What is it?” This manna was an incredible food God provided refugee Israelites fleeing from a brutal autocracy that had enslaved them. It’s all part of the incredible history of the Jewish people. God accomplished this over many years and utilized several key players, the most famous being Moses. In delivering Israel from Pharaoh and the Egyptians, God led them out through the leadership of a very imperfect man who likely had Social Anxiety Disorder, fulfilling incredible promises, miracles, and almost unbelievable wonders. It’s one of the best deliverance stories, maybe in the history of history. If you haven’t read it, please do so in the Book of Exodus.
So imagine being born into slavery, and you gain total freedom from an overbearing despot. But in order to get away, you must go through the desert. I feel tired and thirsty already.
In their refugee state, God promised the Jewish people refuge. But it wasn’t a magical transportation to heaven. Just days after they were freed, they felt the heat of the desert. They had to walk miles and miles. They complained. Only one of the seemingly unbelievable ways God provided for them was through fast, convenient, and sustaining food. It was manna (Exodus 16), which was given in the morning and quail at night. They were already complaing so much they said they wanted to go back to slavery because they had it better in Egypt (*face palm*). In addition to complaining, there was hoarding (Numbers 11) in desperation, lacking reliance on God. I can only guess fear would have been involved.
These details, with thousands of years of perspective can make it seem ridiculous to some when we read on paper or pixels. Why wouldn’t you just trust God when he frees you from slavery and performs many miracles before your eyes? I’m afraid my heart isn’t different. I am the same when I lack trust in God by faith.
- Do I believe God is my provider?
- Do I trust I can take a day off work and I will be taken care of?
- Am I generous with others because God is generous with me?
- Do I love my neighbor as myself?
- Am I patient with others and put others ahead of myself?
- Do I know sacrifice and share in the sufferings of Christ?
What if you have an Anxiety or other Disorder that gives you an extra kick in the teeth? Something that makes these things extra difficult? First of all, God is patient (2 Corinthians 12:7-10; 1 Peter 3:9). Secondly, God asks us to seek Him by faith in all things, just like everyone else (Hebrews 11:6; 2 Timothy 2:4).
I have an anxiety disorder myself. And God has been incredibly faithful and gentle with me, while also lovingly disciplining me (see Hebrews 12), so that I keep seeking him. If you fall into a scarcity mindset [check out my post “Developing A Growth Mindset”], welcome to the club of being human, but if you also have a disorder that makes it even more difficult to walk by faith over fear, welcome to another club that is very large, indeed; close to half of all people qualify for one mental disorder at some point in their lives. Remember, God is patient. God also still asks us to seek Him by faith, just like everyone else. Sometimes walking by faith means praying, sometimes resting, sometimes therapy, sometimes talking, sometimes serving…you get the gist.
As with the Israelites during the Exodus, God accomplished many things over many, many years- and He still is. The Israelites feared, complained, got overwhelmed, and tried to stuff their pockets- directly lacking faith in what God was telling them and showing them. God was patient nonetheless, while he disciplined them. He’s asking us to faith. Faith that God is your provider. Not therapy. Not a nation. Not your employer. Not yourself. Not a president. Not a parent. Not your 401k.
Days out from the “great candy grab of 2020,” my child’s brain experienced the indelible impact of poignant pleasure: she asked daily after this if she could go to neighbor’s front porches!! As I raise her I am prayerful that she will learn well to take her fears and turn to God (and to never be ashamed to get help through CBT or medications). I pray she becomes aware of her God-given feelings and desires, and can ultimately be led back to the rock that is Christ- who is the realization of her greatest hopes and dreams.
Also, Candy is nice, too. I’ll take both, please. 🙂
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