I heard a phrase recently that goes something like this: If you knew you had to fail 20 times before you succeeded, how fast would you want to fail?  Oof.  That is hard to accept when something is essential. The sentiment is to take action, and the realization is that success is rarely on a first try. If it is, that first try is probably for something that doesn’t matter much.

A dream in my heart

Since childhood, I have wanted to write a book. There is something mysterious about it, no matter how much I can explain it psychologically. Most people say they would like to write a book, but very few do it. Humorously, Christopher Hitchins is reported to say, “Everyone has a book inside them, which is exactly where it should, I think, in most cases, remain.” I’ve wondered if writing is not to be in my moments of struggle. As I say, “The Lord only knows.” But it is on my heart, and I will persevere.

Do you have a dream in your heart? Do you long for something to be done that you can’t achieve?

In CBT, I work with clients who live with these tensions daily, and I would be ashamed if I didn’t face them myself. It’s essential to get clear on values, but then to get moving on action to live those values or test them to see if they need to change. Of course, there needs to be guardrails—just like for me, I’m not creating some awful product and hoping it fails. I’m setting my sights on a direction but holding myself accountable in what I can do in a given day. I’m working on accepting rejections as a vital step, or as those in AA say (from the Serenity prayer), “accepting hardships as a pathway to peace.”

50 Rejections

In 2025, I’ve committed to 50 rejections before I reevaluate my direction. I’m pitching to agents and publishers and talking with many others. The book is about how to overcome OCD and walk even deeper by faith. If you want to get the gist of it, my new course was built around its core content. Can you do something today to get past the rejection you likely must face—for something on the other side?