Around here, I’m all about helping people get unstuck. It is a joy to elevate voices of hope. Today’s guest article is by my colleague Dr. Johann D’Souza who is out “crushing it” in the area of clinical treatment of OCD and Anxiety, especially with teens. Join my free newsletter to be the first to receive articles, stories, announcements, and free ebooks: www.justinkhughes.com/getunstuck
Values-Based Therapy for Sexual Obsessions
By Dr. Johann D’Souza
One common symptom of OCD is fear of thoughts, images, or actions of a sexual nature. Also called taboo concerns, these obsessions are especially tricky when they directly intersect with the struggle to live a chaste life. It can feel overwhelming when obsessive thoughts and fears of sin become entangled with our genuine efforts to live an upright life. But with the right strategies, you can address the obsessions while remaining faithful to your ideals.
Let’s imagine a scenario in which someone compulsively avoids having a computer in his room, due to the obsessive fear that its presence may lead him to sin. In such cases, it may not be advisable to eliminate this compulsion if doing so would realistically put him in danger of viewing pornography.
So if you can’t practice exposure to the fear of having a computer in your room, how do you fight the OCD? This is where alternative, ACT techniques come in. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, or ACT, is an evidence-based development of CBT that incorporates techniques like Acceptance, Defusion, Mindfulness, and Committed Action. These skills help overcome OCD and lead to a life of flourishing.
Acceptance is the first step. It starts by acknowledging and recognizing the automatic negative thoughts and emotions that arise, and realizing we don’t have complete control over them. Any attempt to control or suppress these thoughts and emotions only grants them more power, similar to trying not to think of a fluffy white polar bear, which often leads to more thoughts of the bear. Instead, we want to accept the presence of the uncomfortable thoughts and emotions and coexist with them.
Defusion is the art of detaching ourselves from these thoughts and emotions, viewing them from a third-person perspective. Think of them like clouds passing through a mountain, transient experiences that come and go without leaving a lasting trace. By understanding that they do not define us, we are able to put our focus on what’s most important: living a value-centered life.
Mindfulness is the practice of keeping our focus firmly anchored in the present moment. Discarding distractions, we become attuned to our emotions and indeed fully embrace the physical sensation of the emotion in the center of the chest. This is the quickest most powerful way to process uncomfortable emotions. Paradoxically, the more we strive to feel these emotions, the more quickly they dissipate, leaving us with a newfound sense of calm.
Engaging in interoceptive mindfulness involves a 3-step process:
- First, rate the intensity of the emotion on a scale of 0 to 10.
- Second, physicalize the emotion by locating the center of it in your chest, contemplating its size, shape, weight, texture, temperature, color, and whether it moves or changes. These details help us objectify the emotion, further distancing ourselves from it.
- Third, fully embrace the physical feeling through deep breathing. Inhale and exhale through your nose for four seconds, holding the breath for two seconds in between (box breathing). This rhythmic breathing exercise allows us to integrate and release the emotion, gaining a profound sense of peace.
Lastly, let us remember that our actions define us far more than our passing thoughts and emotions, which we cannot directly control. Committed Action means choosing to live according to our highest ideals, prioritizing our values over fleeting mental states. Our choices reflect who we truly are.
In this way, our automatic thoughts and emotions give us a chance to grow in psychological flexibility, and shape ourselves according to our highest ideals.
Dr. Johann D’Souza
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